Wednesday 15 February 2012

Weekend in New England

A few days ago, Sunday I think it was...one of the cats (I have four) turned on the television by stepping on the remote which was sitting on the piano (My television sits on the top of my piano, the remotes lay where you'd set the music) but also turned the television OFF of channel "3" so it was "snow" instead of cable. It was on for about 20 minutes or so (it wasn't making any noise so it wasn't bothering my husband or I for it to be on - we made the "Poltergeist" joke of "They're heeeere!" and went on our marry way). Suddenly, it turned off. Neither us (nor the cat) turned it off. 

Shortly after my Mom passed away and we moved some of her stuff in (including her television -- this television is NOT hers it's a new one we bought a few years ago) it would randomly turn off (and on) when it saw fit. We used to laugh and say it was my Mom. I don't know if it was, or if it wasn't Mom...but it seemed awfully funny that our television never did that before until we brought in hers (which was brand new at the time I might add). 

On March 2nd it will be 16 years since my Mom passed. And I'll admit it, I'm missing my Mom right now. I'm not sad per se, I'm just missing her. And honestly it makes me wonder (for those of you who believe in this with me) if perhaps she's thinking of me right now which is what triggered this. To be honest, it wouldn't surprise me.

Sometimes I'll have a running conversation with her in my head. Usually when I'm trying to sort things out either with the kids or work or whatever. I can hear her words, hear her advice, her her laugh and sarcasm. She lives and breathes within me and I know that. I am a part of what she once was. I treasure that and I treasure the knowledge that I have passed that on to my own kids.

We've discussed my wants, needs, desires, hopes, and some of the actual dreams I've had (as well as the dreams I have for myself). I've heard her laugh at me and with me as I do at and with myself. She's a source of inspiration even though she's no longer here in the physical existence. It's not a replacement of her by any stretch of the matter. But it's nice to know I can still hear her voice when I think about it. I've heard many people say "I forget what my Mom's voice sounded like" after they've passed away. It's not like that for me. I guess I'm lucky in that aspect. I remember what it felt like to hug her, the sound of her voice, her laugh and even what she smelled like. I treasure that feeling, that sense more than I can ever tell you.

So Mom, if you're reading this (and I know you are)...Two things you need to know. 1) Did you know that Paula Abdul used to be a LA Laker girl?! And 2) We love you! Love always, Shirley T. Goodness and her sister Anne Mercy - HAHA! 

I'm going to close this one with lyrics from one of the "Jewish Trinity" that I was raised on. My Mother LOOOVED the "Jewish Trinity" (Diamond, Streisand, Manilow). Her favorite song by Barry Manilow was "Weekend in New England". So...to quote another Barry Manilow song, Mom..."This One's For You".

Last night, I waved goodbye
Now it seems years
I'm back in the city
Where nothing is clear
With thoughts of me, holding you, bringing us near

And tell me 
When will our eyes meet?
When can I touch you?
When will this strong yearning end?
And when will I hold you again?

Time in New England
Took me away
To long rocky beaches
And you by the bay
We started a story, who's end must now wait

And tell me
When will our eyes meet?
When can I touch you?
When will this strong yearning end?
And when will I hold you again?

I feel a change comin,
I feel the wind blow,
I feel brave and daring,
I feel my blood flow,
With you, I could bring out
All the love that I have,
With you, there's a heaven
So earth ain't so bad.

And tell me

When will our eyes meet?
When can I touch you?
When will the strong yearning end?

And when...will I hold you again?

Again.


One Last Glimpse,


~K


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