Saturday, 3 March 2012

Venting: Idiots abound

I'm going to apologize ahead of time. I know I have some new readers to my blog, so just let me say...sometimes in some of my blog entries, I do swear/curse. Unabashedly. This is one of those have been warned.


I know I've mentioned before that I work at a gas station. It's can be a mindless (at times) job - sitting for 8 hours in my little glass enclosure sometimes I feel like I'm on display. Usually I will write and listen to music while Tweeting or texting occasionally. It's a job that truly leaves me time to do other things I enjoy. Which is fantastic for me.

The downsides (and there are a few actually) is that occasionally the "clientele" gets on my nerves. Now...I'm a people person - I play well with others, I don't have a qualm with sharing my toys...But...don't be a fucking idiot or I may just have to drop kick your ass. Capiche?

Seriously though, I recognize it takes all kinds to make the world go round...and that each village has two things "the village bicycle" and "the village idiot". Let me tell you - speaking on behalf of the "village" that I live in - we have an over abundance of both.

As gas prices rise we are more commonly seeing what we call in "the biz" as a "drive off". The people who do this with the intent to accomplish this, will usually go to the farthest most pump from me. This enables them to have a better chance at "the get away with it" factor without getting caught. As a result my boss has put the two outside pumps to "Pay at the pump" only.

This my dear readers, has caused chaos. I mean serious, over the top chaos. It's normal for most stations within the city limits now a days to do this, but for us, with some it seems it is the most heinous crime imaginable. I have watched people pitching full on temper tantrums about it. Slamming the pump back into the holster and doing a burn out of the parking lot arms flailing, screaming full on hissy fit. Seriously dude - is it that big a deal? Yer a grown man, act like it!

This mixed with the normal everyday "there are stupid people among us" routine can make for some fantastic evening's entertainment and it was actually a little disconcerting to see how many impatient people there really are out there.

I had one woman in tonight who went to the outside pump. She picked the nozzle up, I went on the intercom and told her exactly what she had to do. She slammed the pump down and got into her car slamming the door. A moment later, she got out again and AGAIN did the same thing (calmly) - and again I told her exactly what she had to do. She peeked around the corner of the pump at me and shot me a look. She slammed the pump down and came inside. I explained again  she was very polite to me (as was I to her). She walked back out to the pump and did the same thing AGAIN. After I picked my jaw up off the floor I reminded her, she slammed it down, got into her car (Arms flailing while I'm certain she was cursing my family lineage back ten generations) slammed the car door SO hard her car VISIBLY rocked - and peeled out of the spot. She moved into another one (that is NOT strictly pay at the pump) Got out of the car, pumped her gas (calmly) came in, paid, asked to use the restroom and asked if it was okay if she left her car at the pump she had been at (we were busy valid question) And then she said "If only I could remember where I put my car"....Seriously? And you're driving???

Then there was the older woman (I'm guessing she's 75ish if not pushing 80) who thinks (I am convinced) that she is Snooki from the Jersey Shore but with seriously over processed and dried out "blonde" hair. Last week she was donned in tight pants with a jean jacket and black studded thigh high stiletto boots (which I actually liked -- just not on a 70+ year old woman). This week it was black leather pants with a wool jacket with sequins and sneakers. But there's the matter also of her make-up...How can I describe it...uhh well lets put it this way Dee Snider from Twisted Sister called, he's asking you to please - PLEASE stop stealing his makeup look. And I KNOW you're likely thinking "WOW WTF Kendra, that's a little fuckin catty don'tcha think?" And I know I'm no prize winner - but good grief and little fishes people!

Which brings me to my co-worker...(she has several nicknames she is referred to as: Ms. Phony-face Ms. G (for grumpy), Snaggletooth (self explanatory)). We don't get along - never have - and I think I've mentioned (if I have it's a recap, if not...well here you go) If I ever were to say to her "I know we don't get along but..." She would slap a smile on her face and say in a phony voice "Oh honey I like you." Yea...okay right. ANYWAY! My point (And I do have one) is she is no better than some of the aforementioned idiots. (That is NOT to say that ALL of my customers are idiots but I'd say a good 40%  are and that; sadly; is with all sincerity). My co-worker had this habit of (at the end of her shift) taking her till in the back room to count. Same time. Every day. Past an unsecured area into a non videotaped area. Oh she's a cracker jack genius that one! Then, when the boss called her on it and SPECIFICALLY said that she didn't want her doing that...she said she NEVER did that and that was the first time (WHAT?) but she was only doing it that day because we had an electrician in who was doing some wiring. The boss said no, don't do it please. She then got indignant with our boss and huffed out of the store. The next day she had the unmitigated gall to TEXT our boss and TELL her that she was doing EXACTLY what the boss had told her NOT to do, but that she had locked the door. Needless to say the boss was livid. I was like "Are you KIDDING me?". Stupid. And I mean for fucksakes, I'm no rocket scientist but it doesn't take much for me to figure out that "x" to the power of infinity equals YER A DUMBASS!!!

One Last Glimpse,



  1. Back in the early 90's, I worked at Barnes & Noble. A chick called asking for a "ray-zoom" book to be put on hold for her. I asked her to repeat the title. She said "ray-zoom" again. It took me a couple of seconds to ask her if she needed a RESUME book to be put on hold. Her answer was " Yeah bitch, I needs to get me a job." I remember that like it was yesterday.